Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Rapping against hope...


Yeah...
many a times i feel depressed and dejected to see life treat me the way it does...

but then...

i hear a cat crying unstoppably for her lost kittens...
She comes to me...
She looks into my eyes...
as if...
 she is asking me for some help...
i offer her milk...
She is not all that interested in quenching her hunger...
 but...
 still slurps the milk...
vow...vow...vow
She looks at me again and jumps out of the window...

The next minute...
 i hear her cry in the neighbourhood...
She is again in search of her lost kittens...
Soon...
She will forget all about her lost kittens...
and...
will be pregnant with fresh expectations from life...

My mind...
my mind too is almost like her...
it never stops expecting fairness from life in the name of HOPE...
Hope...
i have heard them say often...too often
 that hope is the biggest human strength...
but i...
yeah i...
in my life have found hope to be the biggest deterrent to stay happy...
Hope...
it frustrates you more than it keeps you happy...
yeah...
it gives you the feeling that you are in a soiled nappy...

i hoped to be successful someday...
but then...
what it actually meant was that i am a failure today...
which i am not...
yeah...i am not
How can the master create a failure...
if i am a failure he is a failure...
Is He not known to create masterpieces...
Each unique...in its own way...
Then...
why do i have to sulk if i am not Jesus...

To me...
The only challenge before us humans is to stay natural...
but hope...
which is a euphemism for our expectations and desires today...
have all but ruined our uniqueness...
yeah...today it is natural to be un-natural...
Sometimes...
but only sometimes...
i wonder as to what kind of life it would be for me...
and for that cat in me...
if we learn to live life without any hope...
yeah...so called hope...
Will it be less cruel on us...
Or...
Will it destroy us completely...
Will it be friends with us...
Or...
Will it hurt us frenetically...

Isn't hoping for the best from the future...
 like...
accusing the seed...
for its current tiny, ugly and unfruitful state with no meat...
Now...
Can the seed ever thrive to magnificence...
if it doesn't enjoy its being in the now&here...
all...
because of this added pressure of hope put by the mind...
and the society...
to be big, beautiful and a fruit of some significance...

Can...
future be a bliss if present is not accepted in totality...
Can...
present be a bliss if we keep on hoping from it mortality...

Is...
bliss just an imaginary phenomenon...
Can it be ever realised by a noumenon...

If...
future is unseen...
it can be bright / it can be dark too...
yeah..yeah..yeah
they term hoping for the best from the future...
 a positive attitude too...
but...
if the roots of this hope are in the non-acceptance of the present...
then...
rest assured that it is the root cause too...
for all the pain and the suffering that we undergo in the now & here...
Yeah...Yeah...Yeah
Right now - Right here

Oh God...
please help me to get rid of my mind's slavery....
Oh God...
please free me from this hoping gallery...
instead...
bless me with eyes of wisdom to see & accept life - as it is...
Oh God...
please grant me hopelessness from the other - sick it is...

i trust the YOU in me.

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